A client of mine asked me “How can I let go?”. I thought this was a fabulous question that everyone can benefit from. Here are my top 3 ways to let go.
1. Being ready to move forward is the biggest step. Some people would argue that they don’t want to feel pain anymore or they are sick of feeling sad why would they be stopping themselves from leaving it behind. Well, the truth is, their are benefits to the pain or the sadness. We have to take some time to really look at the whole picture of our reality. Their are positives and negatives to every status quo. As well as positives and negatives to change. Someone might have carried this pain or sadness with them for most of their life. What if their self identity is wrapped up in the pain and sadness lifestyle. When they look at the downsides to changing themselves you could find fears of the unknown, losing yourself, even fear of being happy, capable or great. When you are able to see yourself through the eyes of your pain or sadness to better understand how they play a role in your life then you are moving closer to being able to let go. These parts of you have their own story, way of viewing the world, and even have certain language, feelings and energy. Consider them your pain parts or sad parts. You cannot just let go of parts of your personality, you must know that by now or you would not be reading this. It would be a more effective approach to transform these pain and sad parts into capable, carefree, and happy parts of yourself. This would need you to re-engineer your core beliefs that you hold about pain, sadness, suffering, being incapable, ect.
2. Improve the mechanism that let’s go 30,000 times a day-your breath! When you improve the mobility of your diaphragm so it can descend fully during an inhale and retract completely with its exhale then you will not be holding on to so much crap. Through time and especially stressful periods of life your lung capacity decreases and your diaphragm motion subdues. This weakens your ability to eliminate free radicals and a bunch of other waste that trust me-you don’t need. When you are afraid, focusing and even talking you are not maintaining a normal breathing pattern. For some, the inhale is more important than the exhale. This can be your tell tale sign of where you have trouble letting go. Your body is too busy trying to survive than to thrive. If you created a regular Breathwork routine in your life you would find that letting go is as natural as taking in.
3. To let go of something implies that there is something you are holding onto. At one time you decided to hold onto something for dear life. It had to have been for dear life or you still wouldn’t be holding onto it and trying to let it go. Identify for yourself what that dear life grip was needed for, then ask yourself “Do I still feel that I need this to keep me safe in my life?” or “Does this feeling or thought feel that it has not landed yet?” If you do not need it anymore or you have something still unresolved then you need to give yourself a Letting Go Ceremony. This is a ritual for yourself that you create in whatever fashion provides you with closure. This allows you the opportunity to give yourself a safe situation to allow your emotional wave to crash. This is a perfect opportunity to say, express or do anything that was not accomplished in the past. A Letting Go Ceremony is great for regrets, things unsaid when someone has passed away, difficult break-ups, and clearing your home of clutter. The important thing is that you decide to unravel the grip that you have held onto in a way that empowers you and enriches you.